Enterprise beams aboard some kind of a super Betazoid named Tam

He calls Deanna, “D,” so I already don’t like him.

He impatiently finishes everyone’s sentences.

The Hood dropped him off. Didn’t Riker and Geordi serve on that ship?

Tam has an argument with what Riker is thinking. He also calls Riker “billy boy” because the writers didn’t think we hated him enough yet, I guess.

They think the Romulans might be following.

Their mission is for Tam to telepathically make contact with an alien pine cone that lives in space.

But the Romulans are racing to meet the alien first. The Federation and the Romulans are competing for facebook friends.

Tam gets sick of always hearing people’s thoughts, so he really likes Data.

Tam senses that the Romulans have orders to destroy the alien if they start off on the wrong foot. Tam warns the alien.

The alien sends out a shock wave that destroys the Romulan ship.

More Romulans show up. They seek the right of vengeance against the alien.

Tam and Data beam aboard the alien, and it’s also a ship. It’s lonely because it’s crew died a long time ago. I liked this idea, I wish it had been used in a more interesting way.

The alien wants Tam to leave Enterprise and cruise around with it, and Tam, the crew of the Enterprise, and the audience all agree.